Freedom Of Expression

I have heard depression defined as the “inability to express loss”. A fascinating definition if you think about it. How do people express loss? Emotions like crying and sadness are one way. I have witnessed quite a bit of that lately. Talking about how you feel and what you have lost is another legitimate expression. Counseling and life-on-life mentoring are a great way to bring out deep seated feelings. Writing your thoughts down on paper can be an effective way of articulating what is going on inside your heart. Personalizing these thoughts to God turns journaling into prayer.

I wonder if Paul was processing through some of this same kind of stuff when he said, “I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him…I no longer count on my own righteousness …I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead”. Philippians 3:7-11 (NLT)

We have been talking about the dangers of comparing ourselves to others and how it can lead to discontent and resentment. Paul undoubtedly went through some tough transitions going from a Pharisee to a Christ follower. All that he had dreamed of his whole life changed in a moment. Imagine the criticism and ridicule that he went through. I wonder if he felt as if his time before Christ had just been wasted. You know he had many regrets and feelings of guilt for the way he had persecuted the church.

Following Christ changed Paul’s value system. He didn’t see things the same anymore. Things that used to hold value to him were now worthless…like garbage compared to what Jesus had done. Paul had learned to hold on to things loosely. Knowing Christ was of infinite value to him. In other words it was off the hook…incomparable…surpassing anything else in this world.

I wish I could say I am where Paul was. I’m not. I hope to be someday and would like to think I am pointed in that direction. This has been an extremely challenging year for me personally, a year of loss. Losing sucks. I am still in the process of expressing much of it. But with the loss comes gain…the gain of new and different values…of new dreams to replace those that have been shattered…the gain of knowing Christ more…of wanting to see him and be with him.